Government Official Pillows

'Hi ? I'm from the Government, and I'm here to help you.'

"And this is where we adjust the interest rate."

"But how do you know for sure you've got power unless you abuse it?"

"The way I see it, the Constitution cuts both ways. The First Amendment gives you the right to say what you want, but the Second Amendment gives me the right to shoot you for it."

"Are you sure this is the correct way to declassify documents?"

"Remember,this is a one-shot, not an entitlement."

"So it's agreed then. There'll be no third runway, and you'll head the Fourth Runway steering group."

Rishi Sunak

Whitehall: Gave honest impartial advice

"Checks and balances! Checks and balances! -- You sound just like the silly bank!"

House Intelligence Committee

Theresa May

Three steps to turn around the economy.

'Excellent! So that's all agreed, then! All we need do now is draft the consultation document.'

"The only solution I can see is to hold a series of long and costly hearings in order to put off finding a solution."

'Actually I think you'll find it's really more like this.'

"Personally, I liked this roller coaster a lot better before the Federal Reserve Board got hold of it."

"O.K., the third of July is out. How about the fourth?"

First Nationalized Bank

'OK, that's five votes in favor of saving the historic old hotel, and one vote for stomping it to bits and eating everyone inside!'

The Fort Knox Gold Depository has a key under the mat

Freedom of Information Act - Frequently ducked questions.

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."

Man with megaphone lobbying parliament.

"Give me a couple years, and I can answer your simple question about the new regulations."

'The government announced that to reduce the budget deficit, it will move the decimal two points to the left.'

National Health Service

New Planning Body in beauty spot - 'Nice spot for our HQ...'

'Hi this is Brussels - we're going to need to order some more red tape.'

'The stimulus package doesn't seem to be working,'

'Congress presented its report on simplifying the tax code today - it's 4,385 pages long.'

Power: 'It's mine and you can't have it.'

"I welcome the discussion."

'I'm getting tired of hunting and gathering. Let's invent taxes and government.'

Senate Hearing: 'Define torture.' 'Having to testify before this committee.'