Gourmet Treat Lover Gifts

"Unfortunately for my waistline, the only thing sweeter than mom's holiday greeting is her holiday eating!"

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

You're the puff in my pastry!

"You're the lid to my pot."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"It's hard being a grownup, too – did you know we have absolutely zero limits on treats?"

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

Join me for dinner?

Haute Chinese

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'... Of course, I had to train for this job. I went to sundae school.'

"You see, I don't believe in eating fast. I believe in savoring. I....hey, stop looking at my food!"

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

Cut out and keep your own Chef

"Sorry about the delay, sir. The manager is interviewing chefs at this very moment."

'Good thing you ordered a double portion.'

'Pass the grey stuff.'