Gourmet Diners Pillows

'Enjoy?...How?'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

The wonderful world of cheese.

'You complimented the chef on his dumplings -now he wishes to return the compliments!'

La Table

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

French wine

"I come here for the pepper."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

Countervailing Clichés.

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

"Deep-dish pizza calls for deep-glass beer."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."