Gothic Humor Enthusiasts Gifts

Death Takes A Time-Share

"I've been transferred to the Transylvanian section"

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

"Here we are."

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

Giant Monster in Bath

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

"....and hold the garlic."

Trilby - 'Oh my poor girl! my poor girl!'

The Raven in Flight

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

Cosmetic Stone Mason.

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

Trilby - 'Ca fera une fameuse crapule de moins'

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

Trilby - 'Oh don't you remember sweet Alice, Ben Bolt?'

"No monster, when I said 'lend me a hand'..."

"Graveyards always put me ill at ease."

Vampire Umbrella

'R.I.P. Van Winkle, just sleeping.'

Vampire afternoon tea.

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"Never think outside the box!"

'Wow! Did you see who just flitted past? Count Dracula!'

'Which one do you think Dracula's in?'