Gothic Comedy Lovers Gifts

When Zombies say goodbye...

"Here we are."

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

"What do you mean you're tired of AB negative?"

"....and hold the garlic."

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

One of Dracula's 'coffin mournings'.

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

Rejection leaves a terrible scar....

"Wait! First, his attorney."

Fresh Blood In Politics

'This feels a bit strange: Are you really from the Blood Bank?'

'Wow! Did you see who just flitted past? Count Dracula!'

'He won't bite anyone! I'm hoping it's just a phase.'

Death Takes A Time-Share

'Which one do you think Dracula's in?'

"I've been transferred to the Transylvanian section"

Vampire Couple, "I suppose you're out again for your usual eight pints?"

Trilby - 'Malbrouck s'en va-t'en guerre'.

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"The meal was delicious. My compliments to the Haematologist"

Vampire Humor

"Looks like you're due for a cleaning and a sharpening."

"Dang it! Honey, this whole batch of type B positive has gone sour!"

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"

Dracula Waits For the Bus With A Coffin Briefcase.

"Is that your resting witch or resting bitch face. . .?"

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

'Dracula, I'm getting tired of you sitting around all day.'