Gong Guru T-Shirts

"What do you mean, who are my influences?"

"The guy's a natural!"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

"Gabe's in the Guitar Hero program at Juilliard."

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

At the 2021 Religious Games

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

"Check out this new store."

Kirsten Johnson

Guru.

Bashful in Nashville

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

The Great Blues Heron, Live at the Sandbar

'Wish you wouldn't cut your nails at bedtime!'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

Guitarist: 'We can freely improvise some other time ... now let's practise.' (With Derek it was always jam tomorrow)

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

Joe Henry

'I see. So what you're saying is that you woke up this morning and your woman had done left you.'

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'