Golf Course Detective Pillows

'Our company drone found you on the golf course yesterday after you called in sick.'

Golfer Shouts at Ball to Go Into Hole.

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

Bernstein's got himself a driverless club

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

The Golfing Accident

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

"You know damn well what noise!"

Sunshine and exercise. Are you glad I suggested we go for a walk?

"What are you in for?"

"Eric, this is your father, mister Trump." "You must have the wrong number. I'm Mortimer Park."

"Can I play with your ball, Mister, if you're not using it?"

'On this hole you don't drive, just putt.'

'I'm doing this course on, the importance of moderation.'

"12 isn't a bad score on the hole. You did stray and some of those windmills are quite tricky!"

Golf Crime Scene.

"I'd rather be golfing...and I am."

'What club do you think I should use? I don't know sir, I don't play golf either'

'... just one more ball. Please? Last one. I'll pay you back, I swear!'

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

'Drat, another hole-in-one. Pity really - I was looking forward to some putting practice.'

Suddenly, on the 18th tee at Augusta, Leonard whales on his air guitar right in the middle of a backswing.

"I arranged a foursome like you asked. Allen, Jack, Gene and Howard are playing at three."

"Shhh. I think I heard my name."

'I told you to turn left - this is a bunker on the golf course!'

'Replace divots'

'I may have to borrow some balls if we play eighteen.'

'I don't have a problem with you spending $1,500 on golf clubs, so you shouldn't complain about my spending $100,000 on a sports car.'

"The king of divots, every game is played like the last."