Goal-scoring Hero Pillows

"I'm so grateful to play for this fantastic club....a childhood dream come true!"

Football

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

Kids playing ice hockey for a medal.

"It may have been just a kick-about in the garden, but Eric took things very seriously."

Zdeno Chara

Psyche Delia

The Ultimate Sleeping Bag.

Wilfried Zaha

"You can take her ... just pretend she's my mother."

"You're back! You're really back...!"

"Seeing as you've been so generous giving goals away lately, you're down to play Santa at the Christmas party!"

"So you used to be in a darts team?"

Goalie Wall.

Harry Kewell

"I told you my lucky pennies would work."

"Hey. . . in use!"

'Some day, people will wonder what these goal posts were.'

You look like a team player. I like that!

Covid Defender

T-Rex: the Best Hockey Goalie

'Any idea how united got on?'

Where are they now? Paul Henderson.

'He still can't manage to get into the box.'

How many ways can a coach say 'get the ball and score some points'.

'Do you think he knows we're carrying beef sandwiches?'

'No wonder they call him the Cat - he gives the defence kittens!'

"Oh, no! I typed up all my New Year's Resolutions without saving copies, only to drop them in the shredder by accident! Now I'll never remember them! How clumsy of me! Oh, well!"