Goal Grapher Gifts

'I'm graphing the likelihood of me keeping this New Year's resolutions based on all of my previous resolutions. It doesn't look good for me.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

Reach for the Star.

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

"Be careful what you wish for, Bob, because you just might get it. And if it happens to be what I was wishing for, things could get pretty ugly around here."

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

Bullseye!

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

What else is there to wish for?

The Salesman

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

Upward Progress

Target your customer.

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

Win - win

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

"Colin kept the bar fairly low."

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

Sales.