Global Communication Gifts

'I'd like to give a particularly warm welcome to those of you who are joining us from the southern hemisphere.'

Lynching on social media

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'How fast can you hype?'

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

This Message Has No Content

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

The interested bystanders.

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

G7 Tax Multinational Companies

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

Just Stop Boil

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

World Production.

Barack Obama, Angela Merkel and David Cameron are ecstatic about the possibility of a free trade agreement between the U.S. and the European Union.

Peace Locked in a Cage

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

Population rocket

Coronavirus world

Evolving Changes in Medical Lingo

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

'Can't we handle this through more impersonal channels like text messaging?'

'My ring-tone's inaudible to humans.'

"I thought that modern communications systems were meant to be more efficient...That they would cut down on waste and duplication."

'To make sure I get noticed I always talk in a big bold typeface.'

'How fast can you hype?'

"Oh...Hi Bob, listen buddy, I'm in a meeting right now, I'll Caw you back."