Glass Eye Enthusiast Pillows

'Excuse me while I rub the smoke out of my glass eye.'

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

Tommy Cooper at the bottle bank - Glass, Bottle, Bottle, Glass..

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

'He wasn't doing a bit good, until I changed his glasses.'

'No cheating'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

"May I borrow your glasses so I can find my glasses?"

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

The public was right

Optician and the PI.

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'Those look good on you, They help make your nose look smaller,'

'You're right, Mom. Carrots did give me good eyesight. Now I can spot vegetables I don't like a mile away.'

'Now that's what I CALL a spectacle case.'

'My doctor wants me to watch what I eat, so I'm here for glasses.'

'Thinking quickly, Ernie jerked out his instamatic and clicked away at his farm below.'

"They don't make me look too owlish, do they?"

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

"Eye irritation is quite common when Saturn and Jupiter are in this position. It's called conjunctivitis."

'Sir Steve Austin is here to see you.'

"He did well with his eye exam but was disappointed to find out that laser surgery won't help out his score when he plays laser tag."

You know your getting old when you have to put on your reading glasses to trim your eyebrows...

Same Day Glasses - "They'll be ready in a month. It's not my fault you couldn't read the fine print."

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?"

"Oh, swallow your pride and go to the eye doctor!"

Wine-tasting Tour.

... and I'd suggest you take more frequent breaks from your computer.

"Am I seeing double? You and your twin are the experts, why don't you two tell me!"

Budget Opticians.

"Don't be silly, Wendy...who would make fun of such cute glasses?"