Giveaways Gifts

'Hey son, I'm to look under my cap to see if I won a free soda.'

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Van Gogh was starting to run out of gift ideas.

Santa called but you were out!

"Carrots just didn't get me going anymore, so I switched to chocolate instead..."

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

It's a busy mother's day down there! The glucose molecule got his mom a box of sweets, the histamine brought flowers ... A sodium atom got bath salts, and the genes had a family portrait taken. Frank, the neuron didn't get a gift for his mother. No, he didn't but he always sends a nice message!

Complementary Beverages

Regifts of the Magi

Valentines Day truck

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

C'mon, help me out! Which rock do you think my kids would like better?

Mother using candy cane to pull son away from toy window.

'I brought in a big order and my boss gave me a feather for my cap.'

"Check out my free white paper!"

"The Valentine's Day gift that has it all - a card made from edible flowers dipped in chocolate!"

Can you guess what it is yet?

'Now that's what I call fast food.'

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

Best Pizza in Town, Best Pizza in the World and Best Pizza on the Block.

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

"Ah-sod it! I think I'll get a takeaway instead..."

'What can you suggest for a young lady who thinks she has everything?'

'Prove it.'

"I'm sorry, but until you tell me what you do want for Christmas, you'll keep on getting cats."

'Why do we always get take-away when it's your turn to cook?'

'Forget the waiter...I'm getting a delivery service.'

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

Gift Ideas. What I get for a man who already has everything? Insurance!

'You'd better cut it into six pieces I don't think I could eat eight!'

"Do you have all those things in stock?"

'Just follow my voice to the checkout stand.'

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.