Gimmicks Pillows

"Have you folks eaten here before, or shall I explain the concept?"

…So we finally got women to stare at us…now what?... E. A. N. B. Q. R. T. L.

Candid Camera store.

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

'Do we want to apply for a credit card that plays the song 'Money Makes The World Go Around' every time it is swiped?'

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

For the new gardener.

Anna Burns

Cyber Cafe - "I hear you've got a mouse."

Virtual chicken crossing the road.

"You'll never believe what kind of bumper-to-bumper warranty this baby has."

CHAUCER 411, 'Boy -- that guy spells worse than I do!'

'It needs more punctuation.'

My Year Searching For a Gimmicky Stunt to Base a Book On.

'Nobody likes a show-off, bub!'

'The blasty libeccio fleyed the keitloa.'

'Too many gaspers kept the turtlers from catching the ridley.'

'...And my porridge is always too hot!'

Year of the Tiger

'It's a crazy price but I think it's me.'

'These days, everyone has a new gimmick.'

'So, do you want three or five legged animals?'

Santa in hospital bed with intravenous milk and cookies in situ.

This place says they have the biggest pizza slice in town...

...And that was all for Pinocchio.

Heaven on a stick.

'He won't hurt you - just don't make any sudden moves.'

Lemonade Cleanse - $20 a glass.

"It's $85 an ounce, $95 for unscented."

"Come on...no one would be dumb enough to buy those in a million years!"

Women have been paying more attention to me since I was reconfigured to resemble an ATM!

'I just had a scary thought, Mom -- What if the Tooth Fairy gets greedy?'

Bad boy.

Marketing: Hype and Hoopla desk organizers.

Mexican Jumping Balls.