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The band.

Garage Music

Roadie

The Off-Tones

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

At The Palladium

Dynamite little combo

Fuzz - Nigel can twiddle his drumsticks.

Fuzz - The audience outnumbers the band.

"This next one is for all the people who did the right thing and stayed home."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

"This next song is just a song. Try not to read anything into it."

Fuzz - Max has the taste of success.

Rock On

Fuzz - Fuzzy says 'let me hear you say yeah!'

"I needed a gig to tide me over between baby booms."

'Just remember lads, when the drummer misses a beat we all miss a beat.'

Fuzz - Max expresses pain.

"Where do you see yourself in five years."

"Seriously, the way you rasied me it's no wonder I can't get a gig in a real night club."

'Ecchh! Six weeks on the road! - Lousy food, lousy motels. . . but there's good, too. . . like heading back home.'

"You do understand that I can only offer you a zero hour contract?"

The Reindeer Got a Better Gig

"Everyone's waiting to have babies, so I had to pick up a side gig."

"Hey! Your phone isn't turned on."

"I'm lookin' for a couple of fast guns who ain't afraid to lay down their life. There's no pay, but it'll be a great way to get your name out there."

'This is the last goodwill tour I do!'

'Maybe next concert we should ease up on the volume.'

Fuzz - The band will never lose its artistic integrity.

"I couldn't actually see the band but here's a photo of them on the person in front of me's phone."

"You realise the post is only part time, no more than 60 hours a week!"

"Here's a little song I wrote at my parents home while they screamed at me to move out and get a real job or at least go back for a year of community college."

'Scottish Arts Council? I'm looking for sponsorship to help me sit through a performance of Gotterdammerung.'

"Actually I'm a waiter but things are pretty slow at the moment and I'm looking for something to fill in between jobs."