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"Can you make me look like Wolverine?"

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

I love Museum Shops

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

Never give a cow a giant straw.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Emergency Underpants

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

Toast kidnapper.

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

House for Sale.

Hole Sale