Giddy Glacier Glider T-Shirts

Snowboarding downhill.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

Ice skater

Lemniskate

"Impressive, yes, but what exactly is a black belt in cookery?"

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

Man Skating With Dog.

Pizza Fencing

"And now, moving along to our right, we have Hilda Schumacher, of Zelton Falls, Pennsylvania. Ms. Schumacher has been painting clowns on velvet for over fifteen years, and we find her work a fine example of this genre."

"Binaldi, Ravaccio, Dellacorte... and that's just the frames."

SNOW WARS: The fight-back

"They're so realistic."

Skating.

Abandon all hope,you who enter here.

Survival of the Foodiest

"Involuntary manslaughter. How about you?"

Traditional chefs revolt against new 'Robo-chef'' technology.

'There must be more to life than this.'

"Before you leave for your vacation, re-record your extended leave message. The one you just made is too giddy."

"I love making a glide in..."

"When you're ready to order, ask for me by name. We work on commission."

'There must be safer means of facial expression than closed eyes...'

"To save me from losing it on the bends, I swear by a smearing of denture fixative."

Chef walking out

A chocolate tart topped with lingonberries and infused with belligerent self-confidence.

"Just bring me something that'll put hairs on my chest."

On the Ice.

'A meeting of the 'Bandy' association for the promotion of 'Hockey on the ice.''

Grapes