Ghost Storyteller Pillows

"I'm the ghost of Christmas Tree Future, and honestly, it doesn't turn out well for you."

Girl with book.

"I'm a medium." "Really? I'm a large!" "Your late Aunt Nancy warmed me you'd say that."

Ghost School.

'He's not there at the moment so please leave a message.'

"I wasn't ghosting you I promise!"

"Home depot."

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

The Adventures of God

Zombies.

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

"I got those famous last words you wanted"

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

Tim Burton

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

'Maybe fruit flies don't have souls.'

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Sir Desmond Murgatroyd

"They must be from a time when it was safe to meet in the park at night."

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

Sir Jasper Murgatroyd

"I lose more girlfriends that way."

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Frankenstein's Ancestry

Ghostship

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

Redlaw and the Phantom

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."