Ghost Lover T-Shirts

"To be honest, we're scared you might scare the living daylights out of the ghosts."

"Great. Obviously I can kiss my sales target and my commission good bye."

Rectoplasm

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

Monster Baseball

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

Sir Desmond Murgatroyd

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"Do I have to go out again!?"

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'I've got it made in the shade. What worries me is sunshine.'

Child buys 'Dracula doll': Keep in box until sunset.

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

'Avoid the Christmas rush, drink now.

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

Polterguest: "When is your brother going to leave? He's driving me crazy!"

'It's only fair Geraldine. I had to meet your parents.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

'Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!'

Ghosts and Aliens in Bath

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

Trilby - Mademoiselle Ernestine singing 'Les Cloches du Monastere'.

"I'm the ghost of Christmas Tree Future, and honestly, it doesn't turn out well for you."

"You put it on backward, dear."

"I feel like I'm persecting."

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.