Gentleman Theorist Mugs

You look tired, Randy. Hot date last night? I had a date. That is correct. But was it hot? A gentleman doesn't tell whether a date was "hot" or not. No … but you usually do. Didn't you just patent "Randy's Hot-o-Meter," the hat that turns from white to pink to red, depending on the hotness of last night's date? Did you know the inventor of bacon was vegetarian? He was? Who knows? Point is, inventions are not a statement of principles.

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

The Dandy

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

Capital

'It's called a 'hat' -- you tip it to women instead of hitting them over the head with a club.'

Harrison Ford, no question. Tom Selleck. Without a doubt. I don't care if they did offer Selleck the role first, Ford was a much better "Indiana Jones." I don't care if they did offer Selleck the role first, Ford was a much better "Indiana Jones." Ford was ok, but his character was less that manly. What are you talking about? That's ridiculous! Harrison Ford was the definition of eighties manliness! You're telling me the "definition of eighties manliness" could run around the world for weeks and

"He's such a gentleman, he didn't use a 'mating call' to attract me: he's developed a 'please join me on a date' call..."

'The cows aren't milking much, but it sure is fun to watch them chew their cuds.'

The armchair pharmacologist speaks...

Colonel Bagshot.

The trouble with the speed of light is it gets here too early in the morning.

Doing to many good turns can make you dizzy.

Victorian Gentleman

"Coordinates 135 and 350."

"It's time to pull the plug."

Gentlemen's graffiti: 'Your Mother is merely an adequate cook.'

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 6

A Bad Time for John Thomas.

Moustached man

Gentlemen's club

"I'm having one of those days where I can barely remember which conspiracy theory I'm obsessed with."

Rural Butler Speaking to Town Gentleman

Top Hat

Be the ball.

Life of Riley #4: Panache.

Urbane Guerillas

Truth is Great.

'They've led our breakthroughs in gaming theory.'

Club Sketches - Cause and Effect.

Age Cannot Wither.

"Many of you were weirded out by Monday's 'Randy's Man Lessons.'"

"Thank, Baldo. You're such a gentleman, not like Joey. He's such an inconsiderate bum."