Gentle Joker Pillows

"What if the pushy use it all UP first?"

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

'You know too much,'

Good News about winter

Fish hunting for men.

Candid Camera store.

"How fresh is the calamari?"

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

'My door is always open. That's why I installed a tripwire.'

Beware of Falling Notice.

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Okay, you scared the babysitter...now get back in there and rinse off that toothpaste, and go to bed!"

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'

Shoes Make The Man

Caution May Contain Nuts.

While You Were Out: We Moved!

'Dearly beloved.....and the rest of you.....'

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

Finally there is the right product for real men!"

Sharks hate practical jokes.

"I keep having these funny moods, doctor."

'It's my spare tire. Why do you ask?'

"Uh-oh. We better stop using the fax machine."

' I hit two good balls today - when I stepped on that rake.'

"It appears your anus transplant has rejected you..."

Santa's Helpers

'I tell them it's for a patient in the next room and they don't complain about their shot.'

"Well, you said your glasses needed cleaning!"