Genealogy Prints

'I'm only interested in locating wealthy relatives.'

Jimmy, Sixth-Generation Pain in the Ass.

"Mum, please, tell me I take after your side the family."

'I'm trying to prove we're not related to the kids.'

'Neo-extended family'

"Frankly I'm a bit confused. According to the genetic printout this gentleman is in fact, a goat."

'Dad, have you ever thought about researching our family tree?'

'According to this genealogy website, I'm 60,765228th in line to the throne!'

"Ma didn't want to leave out anyone."

"Paying for a DNA test will be worth it if I find better relatives."

'Nuts, nuts, nothing but nuts!' When Squirrels Search Their Family Trees.

'I warned you, Oedipus, not everybody likes what they find when tracing their family tree.'

When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!

"I got my DNA analysis back. Guess what - I'm a Hapsburg."

GENEALOGY - FAMILY TREE RESEARCH, 'Whoa! -- John Wilkes Booth AND Benedict Arnold?'

30% Heredity, 70% Environment

"Let's see now...genealogy books...genealogy books..."

'Scientists at the Human Genome Project have located a gene that makes us want to constantly look for our name on search engines.'

'I traced your genealogy. Better have a seat.'

Rodneys family tree was a lot shorter than most.

Geneology Service: 'I'm afraid you fall into our 'better off not knowing' category....'

"We don't need to go that far into your background."

"Hey, look, grampa was a flip phone!"

'We haven't had much luck finding your ancestors. But we did manage to trace that suit you're wearing all the way back to the early 80's.'

'It's a coat of arms, not a logo.'

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

They couldn't tell me anything about my genetic father.. Apart from the fact that he'd been a frequent donor!

"Good news, Mr. Vanderfirth. We've traced your lineage back to a woman who lived in East Africa two hundred thousand years ago."

Man at desk researching through papers.

Family Money - "I've been working on your family tree!"

"Actually, Tommy, we're just about full-blooded management, except for your grandfather on your mom's side, who was one-quarter labor."

'I started a family tree too, but I gave it up fairly quickly: Way too many relatives...'

'I'm related to royalty.'

Family crest

'Yeah, they're a bit big, but it's a family trait I'm proud of: My grandfather was 'Dumbo'!'