Gender Difference Ponderer T-Shirts

'Men always crack right when it seems they're staring to understand us.'

"Needs to get a life"

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"I don't know why I worry...Baldo's just a normal boy. It's good to see him maturing...making friends...with nice girls...exploring new feelings...and desires.... You have to go home now."

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

'Soon, you will start to notice changes in your body... massive, horrifying changes.'

Max Weber

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

"... and come out fighting, boys."

Sex Education

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

Telling Self to Buzz Off

Star Trek-the Older Generation. . .

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

Yeah, I woke up as a roach because I was so full of existential dread – Why did you wake up as a dung beetle?

What brings you to therapy, Rudy? Dr. Noodle. I've been feeling like my whole life is on pause. And I can't find the remote to unpause it. Meanwhile, everyone else's stories are proceeding apace. They're all into the second act already. They've all had plot twists, and hero's journeys, and epic love scenes, and thrilling reversals of fortune ... Meanwhile, I'm still paused on the opening credits because no remote. Why don't you get up off the couch and unpause it manually? You can do that?

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

'Please don't read anything into the fact that I'm wearing loafers. I assure you I'm a very energetic worker.'

Retirement Issues