Gazillion Gossiper T-Shirts

'I had always thought a gazillion was some made up number.'

Man Dreaming Of Australia.

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

Horror Stories.

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

"The only think we'll be able to shoot at soon will be that right to roam lot..."

'If Aunt Arctica is on the bottom of the world, does that mean Uncle Artica is on top of the world?'

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

"We're looking toward the Paci?c Rim, Green?eld. What the hell are you doing?"

'So when do I get to see one of those scenic geysers you've been raving about?'

'He says he's training to be a world champion weightlifter - With a knife and fork.'

'they must have the same plumber we do.'

Crime and punishment - football.

"... And in other news: Still no truce at 75 Greene Street, apartment 3F."

"Someday I'll buy a little place in the country and take my finger off the Zeitgeist."

The Globe

'Another unsolved problem - where the money come from to run this place.'

"I'm not just playing video games--I'm contributing to the zeitgeist of the times."

Thank You For Not Interrupting My Endless Stream of Chatter.

"I hear he's made from yellow snow..."

Having Fame and Fortune thrust upon him, Gordy is forced to advertise for an entourage.

"The GPS has three voice modes: Wilderness Whisper, Country Conversation, and City Shriek."

Increasing world population

Globes

' What Austrian bio-chemist is wasting his time with false anti-body leads?' Say - our journal has a gossip column!'

Fish to fish in bowl: 'I'm worried about break and entry by the cat!'

'Well, my boy may be reading at the third grade level, but he's swearing at the sixth grade level.'

"Not so much as a mention on Wikileaks."

Holes: regular, black, with cream.

Aw c'mon, still no reception!

I'd like somewhere unpretentious....