Gateway Guardian Giggler T-Shirts

Unbelievable! Who keeps taking my pens?

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

Clown God

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

Hardy Annuals

"Garden variety allergies."

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

Yard Sale

Beginning Yarder.

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Kid tows his large dog in wagon with 'wide load' sign.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"What are you in for?"

J. Wilbert Dentist - Sorry We're Open

'...and this is the water garden...'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

'He never listened to his mother!'

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

'Where are you going?'

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

Balding gnomes

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

"I used to have A Green thumb but it was mainly for hedge funds."