Gatekeeper Humorist T-Shirts

Heaven Security Checks.

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

The Puck Stops Here.

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

Doorman for the Three Little Pigs

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

'Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again.'

'Do you have a reservation?'

Time Scales

'I don't care who you have a note from!'

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

'Hold you horses! I'm just getting to the good part!'

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

Beware Of The Hog...

"This day and age it's necessary."

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

"There's a man here who wants to add insult to injury."

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Barclay is not putting up with people like you anymore."

Don't worry, you're fine - I'm just having with a latch. A-1 Gate Repair.

"It's a no-go area."

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

"I'll say the old neighborhood has changed!!

Just my luck. Someone moved Heaven and Earth.

'Sorry -- we're overstocked on bald guys right now.'

Welcome to Flower Ridge - Traditional values strictly enforced.