Gastronomy Lovers Pillows

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

Come dine with me!

'Your French dip, sir.'

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

Try to guess the continent dining...

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Before/After

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

Highlights From The Annual Central Park Country Fair

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

"Your meal sounded nice."

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'