Gastronomy General Pillows

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Come dine with me!

Counting ribs

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'This might be the common ground we've been looking for.'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

La Table

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

Try to guess the continent dining...

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

View to the Future

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"This is our soft opening."

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."