Garbage Time Optimizer T-Shirts

'Harold, I told you to take out the trash!'

'Don't worry about it. If at first we don't succeed, we can do it later and get paid time-and-a-half for it.'

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

"We'll analyze the only thing left to analyze: what people throw away."

Blowing dust off an order book.

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

Don't Waste A Moment! Put Down That Magazine And Get Fit While You Sit!

"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."

Dustbin monster.

'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'

"You've opened my eyes to the most disgusting worldly delights."

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

'One day son, all this will be collected.'

Lawn mower - must get longer cable

"You said to start the laundry and bathe the cat, so I thought I could save time if..."

'I'd like to request flexible working to avoid my family.'

A man sits in an armchair admiring his little pickers and trophies of litter he has picked up which are displayed on the wall.

Buried Rubbish

"Why, you're right. Tonight isn't reading night, tonight is sex night."

"Wouldn't you be more comfortable if you lived at home?"

Dustbin monster.

"Waking at 2 A.M. is how I stay one step ahead of all the people who wake at 5 A.M."

"Don't get me wrong, it's good for us, but I can't believe how much food humans waste..."

'This is Billy...my caddy and designated putter.'

'I'd like to investigate your tax return.'

'Gee, I never expected to find this problem here too!'

"Frank doesn't like to waste a minute of his vacation."

"I'm busy right now. Ask your mom if she can be interactive this evening."

Smiley Trash.

Head of Rubbish to fox - 'We're looking for new holes in the ground.'

"Personnel say we can't recruit because nobody wants the soul destroying pressure, the morale crushing hours, the TERRIBLE work life balance."

'But it was never enough. He returned, week after week, looking for more.'