Garage Goofball Pillows

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

Shoot For The Moon

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

The Deaths take a selfie.

"The world revolves around my cat."

'I'm sorry, Mr. President, he can't come to the phone right now...he's doing that crazy hand jive.'

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'Waiter, there's a bank in the soup.'

'There goes the squeak in your brakes, Mrs. Ferguson.'

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

'Congratulations Mrs Marrow, it's a courgette.'

'It's great that you made your own salad, dear, but those aren't croutons, they're dog kibbles.'

'I think we'll have to call the fire brigade again.'

"This place has the best vegan nachos!"

Frank Loved Bubblewrap

'The special today is scraps.'

Ostritch Gangsters.

'Remember when we used to call them Wallflowers? The new term is Mingleberries.'

Time-space portal

'Can you recommend something pronounceable?'

(Can't) Count Dracula.

A Magician struggling to pull a rabbit out of a hat as a rabbit watches from the audience.

Man is preparing pizza by the slice.

The Baby Mechanic

Man in snow globe clears snow.

'More Christmas anyone?'

A mason making a peanut butter sandwich.

'I hope you replace your divots!'

'The fellow must have a pace maker because he collapsed when I fired the garage door opener at him.'

"Is the Black Cherry Vanilla Beer Coolie any good? That depends on your lack of taste."

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

"Ewww....Banana slug hammocks really cross me out."

'Well, Frank, I've told you a hundred times to tighten your neck bolts, but do you ever listen? Nooo!'