Gap Enthusiast Gifts

'Have you seen pictures of those redwood trees with holes big enough for cars to drive through?'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

Cat statues on entrance gate

'Simply put, we are on our ninth life!'

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

'Brains...brains...brains...'

"The disasters are collaborating better than we are!"

Experience-Productivity Ratio / Age-Salary Ratio.

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

"Two, please—one senior and one tootsie."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

'All right, gentlemen, this is the current picture of our growth industry!'

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."

'It's only fair Geraldine. I had to meet your parents.'

Line on graph goes right through floor.

'Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!'

Consumption Graph.

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

'After counsel said, 'You did it', the defendant said, 'Did not', followed by a, 'Did too'. . .'