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And that's why I'm still single!

Welsh countdown

Pirate on Jeopardy

Anne Robinson

'Welcome to the new reality show. Who's the real-life whistle-blower?'

Schrodinger's cat plays Deal or No Deal.

Welcome to 'Dung or no Dung!' The show where a contestant can walk away with a cool, steaming pile of elephant dung!

Jim Davidson

Larry Grayson.

'What do you mean, 'you'll have a vowel'?...This isn't countdown!'

"Now, here's a show we can relate to...'Dysfunctional Family Feud'."

Can't Touch This

"And now your General Knowledge Round...Where does clean laundry come from?"

Welcome to another edition of television's thrilling new game show: It's All About Me! Today's contestants are: John from Dallas, and Lena from Denver. I'm your host, Bob Stephenson. And here's out first question: How many casualties were there in the Battle of Gettysburg? Buzz buzz. Oh, it's a close one. Both contestants buzzed in, but John, you were first. What's your answer? My answer is: I once visited Gettysburg. Ohh, close, John. But not quite. Lena? Bob. My answer is do you like me? We ha

It's on. My new favorite game show! Welcome to: Garbage, recycling or compost?! Dana from New York you can walk away with $10,000 or try to double the green! Double, please. Okay, Dana, here's your object: A takeout container from a local restaurant. Garbage, recycling or compost? Geez. I'm guessing it would depend on whether it's got some cardboard or it's fully biodegradable. Final answer? Recycling. Wrong. Garbage! I knew it. Ridicule her! You've lost your green, loser! I'm sorry. I try so ha

We interrupt this breaking news to bring you breaking news! About half an hour ago, we interrupted "The Price Is Right" to bring you breaking news. An elderly "Price Is Right" fan emerged out of nowhere and began pummeling our news van with rotten eggs. Our newscopter is bringing us video of the lady chasing our van. What is that she's driving, Chuck? I believe that's a Rascal Scooter, Ted.

"Once again, the score is tied."

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Theatre Crowd

Applause

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

The First Annual Game Show Week.

Can't Touch This

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Senior Jeopardy!

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

Vanna White: The Later Years.

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Succession 2

CHANNEL THIRTEEN TAKES ON THE NETWORKS

E=Emcee Squared

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."