Gallery Grazer T-Shirts

"He had help. There were architecture specialists, costume specialists, angel specialists..."

"Is there any way we could describe this bit of old tart that would make a Russian oligarch pay £2 million for it?"

'You can see the artist has tried to capture man's aspirations, using a minimalist language.'

'I may not know much about art but I know what I like to slag off.'

Man Looking At Painting

Larry's used art

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Well....I could've done this!"

"Mr. Right!"

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

bird interprets modern art

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

'Some days I just feel so stuck in a rut that I wish I'd never been invented!'

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

Misunderstood artist

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

'I could do that.'

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

The Rise of Modern Art

Children's Art Show.

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

Cats at private view

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

Rodin's Browser

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

"Now this I get."

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Wow, talk about genius!'

Rodin's Cattle-Grid

'It's not easy painting hummingbirds.'