Gadget Jockey Pillows

The Computer Bore

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

His family thought he'd been wasting his life, but Steve Wiebe was about to prove everyone wrong.

Gamers

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

Kids and Mobile Addictions

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

The manufacturer tried giving the virtual assistant a male voice...but it never listened to a thing you said and forgot anniversaries and birthdays."

Planet Of The Apps.

Game Addiction

"I am fully functional again!"

"For your enjoyment: Please turn off electronic devices, close your eyes, and cover your ears."

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

"Cool game!"

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games may be having an effect on you.'

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games might be having an effect on you.'

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

'Technology can be addictive. If the above is familiar - get help.'

'It's great to get back to the simple life,'

Consoles.

Ugh, you go ahead – I have five months of emails to catch up on.

You were watching tv on your cellphone while driving, and almost hit an old lady. Guilty. No more multitasking. You are no longer allowed to do two things at once. Okay. Or three things! Death of a loophole.

"My eyes ache, that's enough zoom meetings and screentime for today."

'Here's a twist. Before you go on your quest, an insurance salesman tries to sell you life insurance. If you buy a lot you can date prettier girls.'

'That's right, just drop your old computers here...and I'll take care of any data.'

'In a real car, it's called a gear shift, not a joystick.'

"Excuse me, but will you be long?"

'I'm not sure I like Billy playing video games so much!'

"I'll call you back. I'm in the middle of a make-over."

'Pacifiers away please, I'd like to start the meeting,' says the chairman.

Ask Sadie. My wife and I are getting a puppy soon. Any training tips? - Jay and Emily, Charlotte, NC. Sent from my iPad. Oh yes. A tip: Have him poop on your @#$% iPad, you high-tech boobs! Irrelevant and gratuitous. Sent from my lungs. You need the toothbrush app.

"Our smart home is blowing up my text. The oven is mad at the dishwasher. The dishwasher is mad at the lights. The lights are mad at the TV. And I thought out kids fought a lot."

'Oh great. It's Western and I use an English saddle.'

The gaming world.