Future Healthcare Enthusiast Pillows

'That's the diagnosis of my diagnostic desktop. If you want a second opinion, I'll ask my diagnostic tablet.'

'I can refer you to Dr. Staley, who is a noted internist....of the JJ39 computer, which does a wonderful job of diagnosis.'

'Isn't it time you talked to Tyler about the birds, the bees, and signing up for Affordable Health Care?'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Little doctor.

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

"I will give you the specimen some other time!"

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

Coronavirus Global Alert

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

London GPs could become an endangered species.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

'Madam, this is not pornography. It is a textbook on obsterics and gynecology...'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

Parts Department

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

Get well soon!

"Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing on the palate, goes well with cough and cold."

Healthy Patients Only