Future Gi Joe Pillows

'I'd like to be all I can be!' - Recruitment Centre

Baby Piano

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Trombone emerges from pram. Mother says: 'I'm a firm believer in starting them young.'

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

Input From The Front Office

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

"You want to be a comedian? You can't be serious!"

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

Mark Gastineau

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

'At present, my son and I are extremely interested in genetics and heredity.'

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'It's just full of dirty laundry but it makes me feel much more hip.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

Snowman Football Fan.

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

"Okay, he looks pretty stable – switch the middle screen back to the Superbowl."

'That was one of the most beautiful blocks I've ever seen; but you were supposed to carry the ball on that play.'

"Well, come on Son, don't keep us in suspense. Did you pass your driving test?"

"I haven't been in a playpen yet that could hold me."

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

'We've got a personal hygiene foul! Number 70!... Fifteen yards!!'

Before instant replay.