Future Financier Gifts

"If it's all the same to you, I'd like my allowance in bitcoins."

"This one would give even more benefits for when you go."

"I'm tired of all this pro bono stuff - Let's invent MONEY."

'...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education...'

'I already know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about investing my allowance for capital appreciation.'

'I get a weekly allowance but I don't have a retirement plan, and that worries me.'

'My dad thinks I have a future in junk bonds.'

'When you e-mailed that you wanted to invest your entire life savings, we thought you'd be older.'

'We're going to take a financial risk.'

'I'm looking for some high yield income funds to tide me over between student loans and social security.'

'He's so spoilt, he has his pocket money paid into a Swiss bank account.'

'I've invested a few thousand for you in mutual funds, a few thousand in treasury bills and a few thousand in municipal bonds.' 'Could I have a quarter?'

Coins

A child runs an equity stand.

'Just remember - It's 10% interest per day until you pay me back, Dad!'

Positive Graph

"Based on the economy and your rate of savings, I've updated your retirement projections."

"Son, I have just one word to say to you. . . are you listening? Bitcoin."

ABC. Uh-oh, here comes the penalty for early withdrawal.

The Economy Discovers FFF!

'This isn't a diploma. It's a stimulus package!'

"Great! According to this pension calculator, I'll only have to work an extra sixty hours a week to survive in retirement!"

'Want to be my partner? I'm starting a mutual fund for kids.'

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

Junior Accountant

"Sell luddite stocks. Buy funds managed by algorithms."

'He's precocious.'

"I'll loan you a quarter, but next week you pay back 35 cents."

"Tooth fairy funds may seem consistent, and birthday money stable, but you really need to consider diversification of your portfolio."

"I'm eagerly awaiting the transition from holding her hand to holding her credit card."

"Pop, wouldn't my allowance be better off in a stock index fund?"

"Want to trade banks with me?"

"My nest-egg money was working for me okay. . . until took early retirement."

"I'd like to reinvest my allowance into the family...but promise you won't spend my inheritance when you retire."

"I'm afraid we don't offer student loans to elementary school pupils."