Future Diplomat Pillows

Set of scales with white family on one side and black people on the other.

"I know it's just a political buzzword, but the idea of change really resonates with me."

"Norman won't collaborate."

"Can I be completely honest tomorrow?"

"I'm not doing this if you're just coming keep disagreeing with me."

'We think he has a future in politics.'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

'At first I was grounded, but my lawyer was able to plea bargain it down to 30 minutes in the Time Out Chair.'

"If we're a team, the manager should take the heat!"

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"So a play date next Tuesday, okay? Have your people call my people to set it up."

Twice a year, Uncle Mort and Sadie Cohen have an official relationship talk. While this biannual conversation is scheduled by mutual consent under long-standing treaty, some participants engage grudgingly. Let's talk about our feelings. I don't feel like it. That's not a feeling, Snookums! Loophole!

A Terrible Shock

"Keep up the good work and there'll probably be a nice promotion in it for me."

How's the boss today? Should I push his buttons or pull his chain?

Who posted the hilarious pics of you with the goofy haircut? Not sure. Someone who wants to humiliate me. One of the usual cyber bullies. No. Meaner. Hmm

'No, Bob, I haven't noticed you haven't spoken to me in 3 days... I just thought we were getting along.'

Conflict Resolution Training - Cancelled Due To Disagreement Over Venue.

'You'll want Mr. Pigglesworth's version of the story too, I assume?'

'I take it this department has had conflicts.'

"The new boss might seem severe, but he won't bite your head off!"

Excess Baggage: If you can draw, you don't have to know the local language.

'I'm NOT being a tattle-tale! -- I'm being a reliable source!'

"If you must know, like most cats I'm a registered Independent!"

'Miss Kress, who on our staff is in charge of denials and uncomfortable realities.'

'He pats my back, but I don't pat his.'

Student Council. Ernie's no longer on the student council, but he's sticking around as a lobbyist.

'Just tell him you're keeping your nose to the grindstone. Don't overdo it.'

Two workers chatting by vending machine: 'Who are you working on at the moment?'

'While they always come back as unfounded, maybe you could prevent these allegations of sexual harassment by not telling people you like the cut of their jib.'

Avoiding bosses on stairs vs. elevator.

"The boss just stopped and squinted at me! Either I"m in big trouble or he's lost is glasses again."