Future Diaper Champions Gifts

'Their problems are just beginning.'

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"That is one absorbent nappy."

A Tit for Tat.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

Look at it this way: You're changing the future of the nation...one diaper at a time!

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

Father changing nappy, "Heir freshener"

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

'Did you know that baby birds just hang it over the edge of their nest and let it fly!'

"Does it come with instructions?"

"When I said change the baby, I meant his diapers!"

'Oh Sit down again and read your paper!'

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

'Buddy! I'm home!'

Smiling at people who make stupid noises, wearing diapers, crying at least 8 times a night, getting cuddled by wrinkled grandparents... Man, being a baby is the World's hardest job!

'Another common mistake is to forget to take off the dirty nappy before putting the clean one on.'

'Here, take this. It came in handy when I used to change your nappy.'

'Occupational hazard.'

"Well he smells like his father."

"It's as if I never left work, all day long on a turd processor"

"Geez. He's bald. No teeth. And craps in diapers."

"Tell us everything you know and we'll see what we can do about a fresh diaper."

Why it's called child-rearing.

Baby Thoughts in Nappy Changing.

'But that's the baby you took in.'

"Oooglie oooglie googlie googlie..." "Who is this person? Where's the one with the milk?"

'Let's get ready for daycare!!'

'I really don't like breast-feeding, but it's really good therapy for her.'

3 days without an accident.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: What's that stuff by the light switch?

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I might find the colostrum?"