Future Adult Pillows

'Congratulations, your days of avoiding the real world are finally over.'

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

The Facts of Life

"Well, looks like his teenage years might be over: he's cleaning his room..."

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

Wordplay: Hibernation.

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

The Complete Book of Baby Names. Oooh, what do you think of 110101110110? Isn't that cute?

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"We come from the future and just want to say: Hey, thanks for the planet!"

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

Good Luck with your finals.

Baby's First Words... Hi Guys!

Baby, baby maker

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

-THIRTY thousand? I thought you wanted TEN thousand? -I'm having triplets!

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"My father was a Brexit negotiator and his father before him..."

"Dear Mum. As contractions begin I thank you for letting me share your uterus. When do I get my bond money back??"

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

"Enjoy university darling, and don't come back during the holidays, we're going to air BnB your room."

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

Believing that clothes make the man, Dave goes for the 'smart guy' look.

"I know I'm going to get older - but how much?"

'I can't say what the market's going to do, but you're going to have fourteen children.'

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'