Furniture Juggler T-Shirts

Moving a piano.

Golfing Boss

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Travelling

Acclaimed mother.

"It boils down to which I dislike more: ironing shirts or non-iron shirts."

'Sometimes I wonder what I's do without you!'

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

'Choose, Fenwick ? me or corporatge clout.'

"I didn't feel any 'earthquake'."

Choose any combination of the words above to name your brilliant first novel.

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

The Multi-tasking Snake Charmer

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

Health Warning - This job will lead you to drink.

"If Labor Day is supposed to be a day off for workers to spend time with their families...I think Tia Carmen needs a day off from Labor Day."

Bored with yoga, the very fittest neighborhood moms start up a "Running with Furniture" club.

'It looks like you need to eat a more balanced diet!'

"Right, 1:02 minutes to the corporate conference meeting."

"Well if you don't agree with my count, then you do it."

'Treat yourself to a game of pot black.'

'See, I told you I can text and chew gum at the same time.'

Octopus

Writer, waiter, writer, waiter.

Why men hate shopping.

'Sorry I'm late - my wife's tongue stud got snagged on my nipple ring.'

Man at sports arena sees plane pulling banner that tells him to get back to work.

"And as we study this list, one thing is clear... my wife is doing groceries with my sales report."

Moving and Storage: "Did they say moving?"

'Dinners Ready' (Colour)

'Don't worry. If you gain a few pounds, I'll drop extra stuff on the floor for you to pick up.'