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'Great team. Brilliant coach. No ball handler...'

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

"Previously on..."

'He thinks we're watering down the cement.'

'Remember, Harvey, the salesman said to not stay in the hot tub too long.'

'It's for you.'

Kate's Cat Kennel

Sex Education: "Here's one we prepared earlier..."

'Dude! Quick! Jump in! We've got to balance the load!'

'Sorry! I thought nobody would notice.'

"His parents never picked him up."

Call Center Agents Should Be Able To Apologize And To Admit Mistakes.

"Lasagna anyone?"

Ostriches

'Just so i'll know you can't resuscitate a grape-nut, right?'

"Damn it, Eddie! Not during the getaway, too!"

Window cleaner taking ladder out from under his colleague.

"Maybe he'll take a mulligan."

"Up, down or bite your face off?"

A ball's best case scenario.

Golfer on Football Pitch

Receptionist takes managing director a cup of coffee/tea, finds him having sex with someone, leaves, then comes back with two cups of coffee/tea.

"That's an unusual, orange jumpsuit!"

'Hand over all your money or the toaster gets it!'

'Here's the problem, this wall is made out velcro.'

Thieves searching for money down the back of the sofa.

'Where did you last see your club?'

"Come on guys, let's stop arguing: Group hug!"

'You have to trust me, I'm not a doctor.'

'Wait until he's switched on his ipod, then we can sneak up unheard...'

ATM.

'The pizza guy wants to know what floor we're on.'