Funny Gift Exchange Gifts

Labrador Non-retriever

"You ain't gitting on this train until I git off first."

Multiple Amputee Twister

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

'The whole office is slack-jawed and drooling! It's either a zombie invasion or that smooth jazz you play on the intercom.'

"You know, we've given this same bottle back and forth to each other for so long that it's probably pretty good by now."

Solitaire card shark.

Bagel problems.

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

'This milk smells funny.'

'My graduation gown got lost at the cleaners. Think anyone will notice this Snuggie?'

December 24th and the December 26th.

"I'm afraid I can't do anything unless you have a receipt."

'Re-gifting has become socially acceptable, dear, but re-carding is going a little too far.'

The final secret-santa gift exchange between the Greeks and the Trojans.

I think the best part was when we decided not to record it.

A.I. Newreader Malfunctions. . . or does it?

Santa Claus

"Earbuds are tiny headphones."

December 26th . . . The Returns

Man with an umbrella hat looks at man with a hat umbrella.

Garden Centre - "...she thinks she's getting a mink coat!"

'I just feel so much better buying the free range Pinatas.'

'You know I gave up sex and booze. . .it was the toughest ten minutes of my like.'

Two Christmas Stockings - One for Presents, One for Receipts

"I think the tags got switched on our presents."

You know you can't return it. Mother had a GPS microchip sewn into the lining.

"And your reason for returning the sweater?"

"You've had enough!"

Artists Christmas Party

'I want to exchange these toys from last year that I never asked for!'

santa claus megaphone.

Fakir being hurt by acupuncture.