Fundraising Pillows

'Our proposal didn't get the grant, but they want us to teach proposal writing.'

'-and now a prayer for the roof fund...'

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

'Basically, what you're saying is I get a box of chocolate chip cookies and the sixth grade class gets a field trip to Tuscany?'

"My child's school is having an auction, so can your entire life come to a halt?"

"So we're agreed-whoever picks the short straw has to cold-call potential donors and try to raise enough money for some food."

'He is a persistant little fundraiser.'

"Dad, would you consider a leadership gift to my snowboard capital campaign?"

'I've raised millions for charity. I've just never given them any of it.'

"Forget it, kid, I'm tired of getting hit up every time your school has a fundraiser. The granny train stops here."

"Can I come with you? I need a grant."

'I'm raising funds to buy a parachute. Anything you can spare would be appreciated.'

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

Runners at the end of a 'Fun Run'.

'Evolution may be a good idea, but how will we FUND it?'

"I'm sorry, but this is a capital campaign."

Education Fundraiser

"Welcome to the grant application process

Bake Sale! To benefit our town animal shelter

The nonprofit dog fight.

Speed camera: 'Police fund-raiser, please increase your speed now.'

'I'm seeking donations to fund understocked liquor stores in developing nations.'

"The boss says to please come back in, Tom. We'll find a way to fund your project!"

'Notice they never speak in tongues when they're asking for money.'

'And how many cookies can I put you down for?'

"Thanks to our awareness campaign, donations increased. Mostly from folks wishing to remain unaware."

'For tax purposes. . . we can deduct our $7.00 dinners on our tax return. . . the food wasn't worth $7.00. . . they only gave me one scoop of corn.'

"To finance an ark that size I'll have to hold a telethon!"

'Good Lord, what is it this week? New equipment for your kid's soccer team?'

'I revel in competition. I have two charities, right now, vying for my $50 donation.'

"You probably already know this disease from the walkathon of the same name."

'Steve just completed a 50-mile bike trip for charity.'

"I'm sorry, but you'll have to get approval from the offices of Terminology, Evidence, Proof of Demand, Documentation, Measurement and Predictions before I can even think about signing off."

Support Mental Health Or I'll Kill You.

Man arrives at desert island to find Summer Fete taking place: How many shells in the jar Guess the name of the Starfish