Fundraiser Extraordinaire Pillows

"If I'm collecting for one cause, I may as well collect for them all."

"We only got six days of funding."

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

Worker ant's To Do list.

"He says he wants to see the actual brick he donated."

"Hold on a second, Bob. I'm putting you on a stickie."

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

'Al, this is Jack. He's with the Committee to Eliminate the Board of Education. Jack, this is Al. He's with the Committee to Increase Funding for the Board of Education.'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

"Can you come look under my bed? It seems like a complete waste of storage space."

'Hold me!'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

The nonprofit dog fight.

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

"What's ticking away in your filing system?"

'I'm getting a head start for Movember.'

"What are we doing wrong?"

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

"The nonprofit competitive grant season begins

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

'Please help, ma'am. I need support to write my Ph.D. dissertation on 'Successful fund-raising techniques'.'

Outline; Introduction, Body, Conclusion.

'Evolution may be a good idea, but how will we FUND it?'

"I am not a candidate. Just ask my campaign manager, press aides and fund raisers."

Appeals

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

'So then the alien stepped out of the UFO and said that he was a fundraiser from another planet, which was quite novel, I thought.'

'We finally nailed down where our congregation's priorities lie!'