Fundraiser Coordinator Gifts

'Could I borrow your giant scissors for a minute? I cancelled payment on this giant check and I need to cut it up.'

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"We only got six days of funding."

"Our war is against cancer."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

Pearly King and Queen

"He says he wants to see the actual brick he donated."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

'Hey, hey, hey!'

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

'Al, this is Jack. He's with the Committee to Eliminate the Board of Education. Jack, this is Al. He's with the Committee to Increase Funding for the Board of Education.'

"Not guilty?"

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

New Year's Eve party for dogs

"The sound system is fixed so we can start. Would you kindly put the beach ball away!"

"Well, we got the grant."

The Aisle

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

More people working in Voluntary sector than 2010.

'...Just because you hired me doesn't mean I have to entertain.'

'And now, concerning the special collection...'