Frying Ringmaster T-Shirts

'Hoopla!'

"Stinkin' fake news!"

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

Circus

Opening night at the circus: "How's everyone's jitters?"

I just trained with my two sparring partners over there. A "boxed set"!

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

'Nah, the circus ain't what it used to be. It's got all fancy and hard since Circ de Something started.'

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

'The actors guild suspended my membership.'

"I wanna be a clown when I grow up."

'Do you still think we have this family under control?'

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

'What did I tell you about getting caught on the ropes?'

"My therapist said next time he tries to put his head in my mouth I've to politely refuse"

A dog lights a cigarette, blows 3 smoke rings, then jumps through them, as if through hoops.

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

Tired mom: I thought labour ended when leaving the hospital.

Matador.

'I just want to be taken seriously as an artist.'

'So that's where I left my car keys!'

"You hit the ball- that's ping. Your opponent hits the ball- that's pong!"

"This is the part I hate most - he's got terrible bad breath!"

"He's so cute when he waves his little baton."

'When are you gonna get me some real competition?'

'Now, I want you to get back out there and beg him for mercy!'

"Fifi's husband was in the audience!"

'...You have some pretty big shoes to fill.'

"I wish we could go back to waltzes - this boogie woogie is killing me."

"O.K., now—on three, I'm going to toss a second job in there!"

"It's Nellie the Elephant, Boss. She's just packed her trunk and said goodbye..."