Frustrated Job Hunter Mugs

'Make your wishes, but I can't promise anything regarding jobs.'

"It raises trust issues, Mr. Kranse, when your very first question is 'what's the catch?'."

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."

'Incidentally, our health insurance has limited eye coverage.'

"What sets you apart from other candidates?"

"Can I put in a claim for interview trauma compensation?"

'...we are looking for someone with great interpersonal communication skills.'

"'Can correctly complete a CAPTCHA image 8 our of 10 times.' Any other skills?"

"We do price loyalty, but we were also rather hoping for a candidate who could read right and walk on two legs."

'So far, so good -- I got a second interview!'

'Ambitious? You sit there admitting you're a troublemaker!'

'Do you have any other references besides your mom and Santa Claus?'

'Thank you for calling Tech Support. Your computer is one month old. We no longer support that model. Good day.'

"You cleaned out your desk so efficiently you've been rehired and placed in charge of Housekeeping."

"Get another job? I can't! My breed can only be faithful to one master in a lifetime!"

"Naps. Do you have anything in naps?"

'I love your 'never-say-never' attitude, but we never hired you.'

Can You Dance?

Careers Advice

What sort of job are you after?

'I remember you. Were you laid off from this company last month?'

'I didn't bring a resume.. I brought coffee and donuts!'

"I'm not supposed to say anything, but you really aced this round of the interview process."

A sign you're not applying at a fortune 500 company...

'It says here on your application that you were fired from your receptionist position for refusing to answer phones...well, thanks for applying! Bye now!'

"Yours is a most impressive résumé, and you've scented it with beef."

'I'm afraid we can't hire you because of your salary requirements. You require one.'

"I see you did a swashbuckling internship with Blackbeard. Impressive."

"Does it look like I am actively seeking work?"

'This sounds promising... 'Help wanted: Live Bait'...'