Frustrated Foreman Prints

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

"Hey, I just consider myself very fortunate to be getting paid for something I'd be doing anyway."

"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"

Great training inspires employees: 'I see myself doing you job before too long...'

'No it's still not fixed'

"I hate doing appraisals, it involves thinking about them."

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

How to Build a Bungalow

"You see? You gotta turn it counter-clockwise."

"This is my son...I want him to work his way up all the way from the bottom- even if it takes all day."

'As I always say, 'If at first you don't get a passing building inspection report, get mad and tear it up.''

"That's why we wear hard hats"

Lady convincing her husband to have wallpaper instead of plaster.

Self-Assembly Bookcase

'Okay. Now. Insert Part K into slot G...'

"I thought it would be cheaper to weed wack our shag carpet rather than replace it."

'I was close to a breakthrough when the grant money ran out.'

'I think I see your problem. You didn't use the swear words listed in the assembly instructions.'

"Dang it."

"Hello... is that the help desk?"

Scaffolding being put together by glue.

"You are domineering, foulmouth and aggressive - how would you like to be foreman?"

'Remind me to tell the crane driver to bring a flask tomorrow.'

I'm in a Beatles-inspired band with a few buddies. One guy is a software engineer who wrote a song about a lengthy, convoluted program. It's called the "The Long and Winding Code." The magazine editor wrote a song about checking articles for accuracy. It's titled "Facts Man." And there's a song by the factory foreman about sullen workers tightening nuts all day. It's call "Twist and Pout." You should do a song warning about the wordplay. We have one! The title is "Here Comes the Pun"!

'I think I should take my hubby for counselling. . . his brain and hands aren't on talking terms.'

Construction in 2022

"Our funding ran out again. Whip up another batch of crystal meth."

"Don't tell me how to work safely! I've been at this job for five years!"

Workmen Lifting.

Workman lifting plasterboard.

Construction safety.

"This bill is the same as your estimate! What did'nt you do?"

A foreman at a construction site glares at a smoker and points to the 'Smoking Area' at the end of a high crane.

Shoot...not literally, of course.