Frontier Food Explorer Gifts

The Upchuck Wagon

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

La Table

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

Before/After

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

'Is this still America?'

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

"Don't worry about it now, but I'll need that hook back when you're done."

"Oh, Oh, Oooohh!"

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

A dozen predictions for foods of the future.

"We can hit any creperie you want, sonny boy."

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

'How was the squid?'

Pastrami in the wild