Friend's Night Out Gifts

Losers Lounge, Less Unhappy Hour 4:30-5:30

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

"Oh, that? It pops up when Bob's social battery runs out."

Here's to absent friends. Those lucky dogs.

Newark by Night. A new Dutch restaurant just opened. What do you know about Dutch cuisine? Nothing. But I'm a big fan of the "Dutch Treat" concept.

Pub Tourettes

Noises from armpits.

Leave the bottle

'I tried letting it all hang out, and somebody stepped on it.'

Sports Bar ???

"What did you think I meant by 'topless bar'?"

'You were wrong, Bob, that wasn't her come-hither look!'

Sloaney Pony.

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

I could have danced all night!

Mardi Gras

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

Party Animals.

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Dick was the kind of guy who wanted everyone to know it was his birthday.

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

'I'm too hot to trot.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

Sally woke up with a headache. This house didn't look familiar. There was a rug burn on her forehead. Three good reasons to quit drinking.

The devil you know and his plus one